It's a complaint I hear from just about everyone. It's a rare thing now a days to hear accolades from someone who has received exceptional service from an 800 number or from a service person in-store. My boyfriend was recently very impressed with the service he received when calling the Kobo e-reader Technical Support number. Not only did a live human answer the phone, she did so within two rings! Wow, it's a sad state of affairs when you are excited when treated with respect.
Recently, I experienced the norm. An in-store experience left me shaking my head in wonder, yet again. I do not know why these things surprise me. It happens all the time, so I must have expectations of grandeur. Of maybe finding someone that actually knows what they're doing and takes pride in their job.
The SIM card in my iPhone stopped working suddenly, in the middle of a call, of course. I don't know much about SIM cards or their importance in the cellular world, but I quickly deduced that your mobile phone is of little value when they stop functioning. I did what I thought was the wise thing to do. I called Bell Mobility, my provider.
"My iPhone says "No SIM'. I assume it's there because I was actually talking to someone on the phone." She tells me there are a few things we can try so we attempt some things to see if it's just a funny little glitch - her words. After ten minutes, it becomes painfully apparent the SIM card is dead and she tells me sadly that I will have to take the phone to a Bell corporate store. She was quite pleasant actually, seemed quite apologetic at the inconvenience of me having to drive to have my six month old phone looked at. I asked her if SIM cards were covered under warranty. She said it depended when the card was activated. I pointed out that I probably wouldn't have activated a SIM card without activating the iPhone (is it just me?) but she was unable to verify if SIM cards were covered or not.
The next day at lunch, I drive to the mall, enter the Bell store with a premonition of disaster. I figured these SIM cards cost about $200 and I was going to have to write a letter to the CEO of Bell.
I approach a youngish guy.
"Can I help ya?" He sounded really disinterested. LIke he'd rather be clipping his toenails. I explain the issue. I told him I called Bell tech support, tried a bunch of things, they told me to bring it to them.
"Didja turnitoff?"
"Sorry?" I ask. I don't understand "jumblelanguage". I tried to learn it when my kids were teenagers but I couldn't quite grasp it enough to carry on a conversation.
"DID-YOU-TURN-IT-OFF?" he repeats, as if I am deaf.
"YES-ABOUT-TEN-TIMES. THEY-SAID-THE-SIM-CARD-IS-NO-GOOD'", I tell him, in case HE is indeed deaf.
So he takes the phone, goes behind the desk and looks in a pen holder for a little doo hickey to remove the SIM card. He can't find one. Complains to his co-worker. Looks around a bit more. She hands him something. Rolls her eyes. I stand there thinking "Wow. The professionalism".
I remember as a teenager, getting my first job as a cashier at a Beckers store in my neighbourhood. My mother was a head cashier for years at a Dominion Store. The first things she told me? Always be polite. And never ever walk around looking like you're an idiot. This guys mother never was a head cashier at Dominion. Obviously.
Eventually he was able to remove the SIM card from the phone. He looks at it. Blows on it. Puts it back in the phone. Turns the phone on. Looks at the phone.
"Yer SIM cardsnogood."
"I know. That's why I am here."
"It's five bucks for a SIM card."
"Okay", I say. He stares at me. "Just out of curiosity, is it not covered under warranty? The phone is six months old."
"SIM cards aren't covered under warranty", he responds, without offering any explanation as to why this is so.
"Okay then." I reach into my purse for my wallet and pull out a twenty dollar bill. I place the money on the counter in front of him. He types something into a computer, the screen I can not see. I assume he is accessing my personal information, like my address, date of birth, date of my last menstrual cycle. This takes a few minutes. I patiently wait. (This is a HUGE deal for me but this rude young man holds the key to getting my phone working again).
"Soooooo, didja want the SIM card or not?" I look at him to make sure he's really a living breathing human being. I wanted to say "You've got to be kidding? What the hell am I going to do with an iPhone without a SIM card? Use it for an iPod? A camera? Are you stupid? Not enough oxygen?" But being a generally polite person, all I said was:
"I guess if I want to have a phone I have no choice, do I?" Duh.
Honestly.......
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Friday, July 23, 2010
Irks and Quirks - Why Do You Do Those Things You Do
It's time for another rant blog. I don't know why. Perhaps it's my mood. Perhaps it's that next week I will be another year older. Or maybe it's that I don't understand a lot of what other people do. Common sense appears to be lacking in a lot of people in this day and age. A lot of what other people do doesn't make sense to me. Sometimes people say one thing, but do another. They lie. They spout a lot of bull shit. They make up stuff in the hopes that you will cow tow to whatever it is they're looking for.
But I am not a patient woman and I have no tolerance for a lot of bullshit. This is a problem, not only for me, but for anyone who is forced to deal with me on a regular basis. Some would consider this a personality flaw to be sure. I sometimes wish I could just be happy with whatever crap people throw my way, but I can’t. I am opinionated, a loudmouth and I really don’t give a shit what other people think of me. And frankly, I am too old to feel the need to deal with this crap.
I do have some basic rules that I have tried to live by and that I expect others to also live by, especially if they are a part of my life. It's not that I am being judgmental, it's just that being nice to each other is a lost art that I hope will come back one day.
The Insistors: Someone asks you if you want to do something. You explain that you either can't or don't want to. Doesn't really matter whether or not you can't or don't want to, you've said no. But they insist. They come up with a dozen different scenarios that would allow you to do whatever it is you can't or don't want to do. You get annoyed because you've probably explained at length why you either can't or don't want to. But they go on about it. To me this says that this person either a: doesn't trust that you know your self enough to know that you don't want something or b: that you're lying. Which to me is insulting.
Lack of empathy – I sometimes complain about the state of my life due to a soon-to-be ex-husband that doesn’t feel that he needs to come through with support. I often hear things like “Well, you’ve got it a lot better than other people” and “What do YOU have to complain about? You have a nice house, a nice car” etc etc. And my favourite “You’re stressed? Why are YOU stressed?” Well, the thing is that EVERYONE has their problems. And while you may feel yours are the worst in the world, the person next to you may have a hard time dealing with whatever (you think is minor) issue they’re dealing with at the time. Sure, I don’t have it as bad as some other people. I admit that. But the fact remains it is stressful not having enough money to pay bills or buy groceries. Sure, one of my kids isn’t dying from cancer or in a coma. I know that. But belittling other people’s battles, however small isn’t called for either. Maybe I am bi-polar and this latest stress is going to send me into a deep depression that I may never get out of? Okay, I am not, but you never know who is.
Parents that don’t take the time to teach their children manners. Or how to behave in public or someone else’s house. Lots of these around, wouldn’t you say? Nothing better than paying to have a nice dinner out and listening to the theatrics of a 6 year old throughout the whole thing. Listen parents – your children should be your priority. I don’t care how important you think you are, in your job or wherever it is you go, your children should be number one. Take the time to teach them how to behave. Bratty kids like yours will get beat up and picked on because they’re so damn unbearable!! And please don't take the easy way out. Don't tell your misbehaving brat "One more time, I am getting up to smack your butt!" only to remain on your ass the next time they do whatever it is that's driving you nuts. Follow through. Nothing says "Sucker" to your kids more than not doing what you say you will.
Nosey people….yes, you know who you are. Those are the people that feel they should be privy to every intimate detail of your life and act hurt when they hear something that you didn’t share with them. They feel that you should have told them. I don’t get it. I have a hard enough time keeping track of my own life, I really don’t feel the need to worry about telling other people that I got my hair done, bought steak for dinner or am planning a shopping trip. Really. Who cares?? If something is going on and I feel it’s important to tell whoever, I will. But other than that, mind your own business. (I am not talking about you D).
Conversation hijackers – You’re standing outside at work one sunny afternoon and the office know-it-all comes out and over hears your conversation. Suddenly, he jumps in, gives his two cents worth, winds up changing the subject and you’re standing there thinking “Wha’ happened?”
People that are never wrong and even when you prove they’re wrong, they don’t apologize. I enjoy a good argument. What I don't enjoy is trying to get my point across and having the other person refuse to listen. It annoys the hell out of me. Even after telling the person "I understand your point but please be reasonable and listen to mine", they often refuse to keep their trap shut. It's inconsiderate and disrespectful. What's worse is when someone tells you you're wrong, every which way from here to Sunday and even after proving that THEY are wrong, they continue to say things like "I was quite sure I was right". Well, buddy, you weren't. Just say, "Gee, I am sorry" instead of whining about how misinformed you were.
Nervy people – I have a brother who lives with my parents. He has a three year old daughter and during his visits with her, she goes and stays at my Mom’s. The problem is my mother smokes and my brother doesn’t want his daughter exposed to it. Fair enough….but it’s not his house. I have tried to encourage him gently to move out, but he doesn’t budge. After all, if he had to pay rent, he wouldn’t be able to afford to golf twice a week, go on trips and have dinner and drinks in a restaurant on a regular basis. So regularly, he calls and asks to stay at my house. Or at my sisters. I wouldn’t mind so much except that you only see or hear from him when he has his daughter. A few months ago, I was in the hospital for three days. He calls me, while in the hospital, to let me know he’d like to come visit with his daughter that upcoming weekend. I said “I am kind of in the hospital right now”. He said “Well, you’ll be out by the weekend and it’s your turn anyway”. Hold on….my TURN? I do you a favour every month or so, feed you and your child and it’s MY TURN? My turn for what? To be taken advantage of?? Hello??? McFly????
People that can't take what they give. I am sure everyone knows these people. These are the ones that feel it's their business, without being asked, to give you their opinion on just about anything. Nothing is sacred. How to live your life. How to cook. How to manage your money. How you shouldn't have bought something. How you should do your hair. Whatever it is, they have the answer. They expend great energy going on at length. Eventually, you begin to tune them out, they are droning on so much. They have all the answers and if you're too stupid to listen, well, they'll just keep going on about it. Then the day may come when you may have an opinion to offer. You offer it nicely, perhaps saying "I think maybe the way to approach it is....." and almost immediately you are informed you know nothing about it and are basically told you should mind your own business, you don't understand and what the hell would you know about it anyway? Huh? You are somewhat shocked (but not really because know it alls know it all, don't they?) and why would they require the opinon of someone like you anyway? No matter how reasonable or common sense your approach may be, it won't make sense to the know it all. So my advice is to say nothing. Don't offer your opinions because you're wasting your breath. And in the future when said know it all offers theirs, politely let them know you can handle your own affairs.
Me thinks they assume too much. I try in my dealings to not assume things. I assume the sun will come up tomorrow. I assume I will not win the lottery. I assume I will despise being at work. But I will not assume an OLG representative will decide to give me $2 million just because I have been buying tickets for twenty years. I will assume my parents will not surprise me with a visit on my birthday. I will assume my ex will not have a change of heart and decide to settle with me before our court date. Assuming does nothing but cause disappointment. Expectations can be a very bad thing. History has taught me that much. So sometimes when people assume things with me, I feel bad, although I shouldn't. All I can say is assume nothing, then when you DO get something, you will be happy that you got an unexpected surprise.
Manipulators are a special breed. There are people that will do things just because they don't like something. Or won't do things because they don't like something. For instance, have you ever had someone say they will do something, but will change their mind when something totally unrelated doesn't go their way? I had a friend who offered (note that - offered) to do something for me, quite minor actually. I needed something picked up at a store that was convenient to their work. Little did I know that it was contingent on ME doing a favour for them, something I was unable to do. Not only did they not pick up the item, they didn't talk to me for over a week. That is a mild form of manipulation. Favours for friends or loved ones shouldn't be offered because you want something from them. Nor should they be taken back because you aren't going to get something in return. Not nice and really not appreciated. In this same vein, doing a favour for someone and reminding them of it constantly.... Also, not nice.
The Users....I have friends, or had friends that used to visit me regularly. Probably four or five times a year. They would stay the weekend, often longer. A couple of years ago, their son moved to within forty minutes of me. Guess what? I haven't seen them since. Seriously. I figured a lot of it had to do with me breaking up with my husband, who they were also friends with, whose side they took when we split, but that didn't stop them from visiting for two years before their son moved. I guess they didn't mind remaining friends with me then. But now, why bother? They don't need to. When they need cheap easy access to Toronto, they can stay at their sons.
Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.... finally, one of the worst types in my opinion. It's unfortunate for me but I am an emotional sponge. Stick me in a room with fifteen happy, smiling, laughing people and a more pleasant Sue you will never see. Put me in a room, alone, with one grump? Call me psycho and call in the padded wagon. Even worse for me are the Mr. Hyde types. One minute pleasant, enjoying themselves, the next, like a dark cloud filling up a blue sky. I can't handle it. Perhaps it was growing up with a bi-polar mother (back in the day it was manic-depression, they had to "pretty up" a horrible disease) I am not sure but to me, it feels like someone is standing above me pouring cool water over my head. It effects everything - my body, my emotions. My mother was the queen of Mr Hyde. One minute she would be smiling and laughing, the next, she'd be holding the Christmas tree over her head, wondering which of her loved ones deserved to be beaned with it more. Not nice. I know, she was ill but it was hard to deal with. Hard to deal with now as an adult never mind as a child. Hard to deal with knowing the person can't help it but inconceivable when the person does not have bi-polar disorder.
And no, I am not perfect. But I don't think I am a worthless shit either. But, to me I say "Happy Almost Birthday Sue" and "Congratulations - you haven't strangled anyone - yet".
Cheers
But I am not a patient woman and I have no tolerance for a lot of bullshit. This is a problem, not only for me, but for anyone who is forced to deal with me on a regular basis. Some would consider this a personality flaw to be sure. I sometimes wish I could just be happy with whatever crap people throw my way, but I can’t. I am opinionated, a loudmouth and I really don’t give a shit what other people think of me. And frankly, I am too old to feel the need to deal with this crap.
I do have some basic rules that I have tried to live by and that I expect others to also live by, especially if they are a part of my life. It's not that I am being judgmental, it's just that being nice to each other is a lost art that I hope will come back one day.
The Insistors: Someone asks you if you want to do something. You explain that you either can't or don't want to. Doesn't really matter whether or not you can't or don't want to, you've said no. But they insist. They come up with a dozen different scenarios that would allow you to do whatever it is you can't or don't want to do. You get annoyed because you've probably explained at length why you either can't or don't want to. But they go on about it. To me this says that this person either a: doesn't trust that you know your self enough to know that you don't want something or b: that you're lying. Which to me is insulting.
Lack of empathy – I sometimes complain about the state of my life due to a soon-to-be ex-husband that doesn’t feel that he needs to come through with support. I often hear things like “Well, you’ve got it a lot better than other people” and “What do YOU have to complain about? You have a nice house, a nice car” etc etc. And my favourite “You’re stressed? Why are YOU stressed?” Well, the thing is that EVERYONE has their problems. And while you may feel yours are the worst in the world, the person next to you may have a hard time dealing with whatever (you think is minor) issue they’re dealing with at the time. Sure, I don’t have it as bad as some other people. I admit that. But the fact remains it is stressful not having enough money to pay bills or buy groceries. Sure, one of my kids isn’t dying from cancer or in a coma. I know that. But belittling other people’s battles, however small isn’t called for either. Maybe I am bi-polar and this latest stress is going to send me into a deep depression that I may never get out of? Okay, I am not, but you never know who is.
Parents that don’t take the time to teach their children manners. Or how to behave in public or someone else’s house. Lots of these around, wouldn’t you say? Nothing better than paying to have a nice dinner out and listening to the theatrics of a 6 year old throughout the whole thing. Listen parents – your children should be your priority. I don’t care how important you think you are, in your job or wherever it is you go, your children should be number one. Take the time to teach them how to behave. Bratty kids like yours will get beat up and picked on because they’re so damn unbearable!! And please don't take the easy way out. Don't tell your misbehaving brat "One more time, I am getting up to smack your butt!" only to remain on your ass the next time they do whatever it is that's driving you nuts. Follow through. Nothing says "Sucker" to your kids more than not doing what you say you will.
Nosey people….yes, you know who you are. Those are the people that feel they should be privy to every intimate detail of your life and act hurt when they hear something that you didn’t share with them. They feel that you should have told them. I don’t get it. I have a hard enough time keeping track of my own life, I really don’t feel the need to worry about telling other people that I got my hair done, bought steak for dinner or am planning a shopping trip. Really. Who cares?? If something is going on and I feel it’s important to tell whoever, I will. But other than that, mind your own business. (I am not talking about you D).
Conversation hijackers – You’re standing outside at work one sunny afternoon and the office know-it-all comes out and over hears your conversation. Suddenly, he jumps in, gives his two cents worth, winds up changing the subject and you’re standing there thinking “Wha’ happened?”
People that are never wrong and even when you prove they’re wrong, they don’t apologize. I enjoy a good argument. What I don't enjoy is trying to get my point across and having the other person refuse to listen. It annoys the hell out of me. Even after telling the person "I understand your point but please be reasonable and listen to mine", they often refuse to keep their trap shut. It's inconsiderate and disrespectful. What's worse is when someone tells you you're wrong, every which way from here to Sunday and even after proving that THEY are wrong, they continue to say things like "I was quite sure I was right". Well, buddy, you weren't. Just say, "Gee, I am sorry" instead of whining about how misinformed you were.
Nervy people – I have a brother who lives with my parents. He has a three year old daughter and during his visits with her, she goes and stays at my Mom’s. The problem is my mother smokes and my brother doesn’t want his daughter exposed to it. Fair enough….but it’s not his house. I have tried to encourage him gently to move out, but he doesn’t budge. After all, if he had to pay rent, he wouldn’t be able to afford to golf twice a week, go on trips and have dinner and drinks in a restaurant on a regular basis. So regularly, he calls and asks to stay at my house. Or at my sisters. I wouldn’t mind so much except that you only see or hear from him when he has his daughter. A few months ago, I was in the hospital for three days. He calls me, while in the hospital, to let me know he’d like to come visit with his daughter that upcoming weekend. I said “I am kind of in the hospital right now”. He said “Well, you’ll be out by the weekend and it’s your turn anyway”. Hold on….my TURN? I do you a favour every month or so, feed you and your child and it’s MY TURN? My turn for what? To be taken advantage of?? Hello??? McFly????
People that can't take what they give. I am sure everyone knows these people. These are the ones that feel it's their business, without being asked, to give you their opinion on just about anything. Nothing is sacred. How to live your life. How to cook. How to manage your money. How you shouldn't have bought something. How you should do your hair. Whatever it is, they have the answer. They expend great energy going on at length. Eventually, you begin to tune them out, they are droning on so much. They have all the answers and if you're too stupid to listen, well, they'll just keep going on about it. Then the day may come when you may have an opinion to offer. You offer it nicely, perhaps saying "I think maybe the way to approach it is....." and almost immediately you are informed you know nothing about it and are basically told you should mind your own business, you don't understand and what the hell would you know about it anyway? Huh? You are somewhat shocked (but not really because know it alls know it all, don't they?) and why would they require the opinon of someone like you anyway? No matter how reasonable or common sense your approach may be, it won't make sense to the know it all. So my advice is to say nothing. Don't offer your opinions because you're wasting your breath. And in the future when said know it all offers theirs, politely let them know you can handle your own affairs.
Me thinks they assume too much. I try in my dealings to not assume things. I assume the sun will come up tomorrow. I assume I will not win the lottery. I assume I will despise being at work. But I will not assume an OLG representative will decide to give me $2 million just because I have been buying tickets for twenty years. I will assume my parents will not surprise me with a visit on my birthday. I will assume my ex will not have a change of heart and decide to settle with me before our court date. Assuming does nothing but cause disappointment. Expectations can be a very bad thing. History has taught me that much. So sometimes when people assume things with me, I feel bad, although I shouldn't. All I can say is assume nothing, then when you DO get something, you will be happy that you got an unexpected surprise.
Manipulators are a special breed. There are people that will do things just because they don't like something. Or won't do things because they don't like something. For instance, have you ever had someone say they will do something, but will change their mind when something totally unrelated doesn't go their way? I had a friend who offered (note that - offered) to do something for me, quite minor actually. I needed something picked up at a store that was convenient to their work. Little did I know that it was contingent on ME doing a favour for them, something I was unable to do. Not only did they not pick up the item, they didn't talk to me for over a week. That is a mild form of manipulation. Favours for friends or loved ones shouldn't be offered because you want something from them. Nor should they be taken back because you aren't going to get something in return. Not nice and really not appreciated. In this same vein, doing a favour for someone and reminding them of it constantly.... Also, not nice.
The Users....I have friends, or had friends that used to visit me regularly. Probably four or five times a year. They would stay the weekend, often longer. A couple of years ago, their son moved to within forty minutes of me. Guess what? I haven't seen them since. Seriously. I figured a lot of it had to do with me breaking up with my husband, who they were also friends with, whose side they took when we split, but that didn't stop them from visiting for two years before their son moved. I guess they didn't mind remaining friends with me then. But now, why bother? They don't need to. When they need cheap easy access to Toronto, they can stay at their sons.
Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.... finally, one of the worst types in my opinion. It's unfortunate for me but I am an emotional sponge. Stick me in a room with fifteen happy, smiling, laughing people and a more pleasant Sue you will never see. Put me in a room, alone, with one grump? Call me psycho and call in the padded wagon. Even worse for me are the Mr. Hyde types. One minute pleasant, enjoying themselves, the next, like a dark cloud filling up a blue sky. I can't handle it. Perhaps it was growing up with a bi-polar mother (back in the day it was manic-depression, they had to "pretty up" a horrible disease) I am not sure but to me, it feels like someone is standing above me pouring cool water over my head. It effects everything - my body, my emotions. My mother was the queen of Mr Hyde. One minute she would be smiling and laughing, the next, she'd be holding the Christmas tree over her head, wondering which of her loved ones deserved to be beaned with it more. Not nice. I know, she was ill but it was hard to deal with. Hard to deal with now as an adult never mind as a child. Hard to deal with knowing the person can't help it but inconceivable when the person does not have bi-polar disorder.
And no, I am not perfect. But I don't think I am a worthless shit either. But, to me I say "Happy Almost Birthday Sue" and "Congratulations - you haven't strangled anyone - yet".
Cheers
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