Pet Peeve #1 - Work

My number one pet peeve is work. Not only do I have to spend a third of my day there, it's boring. Throw in a few idiots and incompetents, we're talking about full blown insanity.

Take the head of one such department in the media relations company where I work. An older gentlemen with thirty plus years, he could have retired five years ago. To say that he's clueless is to point out that World War II was a minor inconvenience.

Not only does he lack the basic social skills I taught my kids when they were six, he can't speak properly and thinks he's the only person in the world that can run his department. We often hear things like "If I retired, they'd be calling in six months to hire me as a consultant" or "No one else could do this job, if I am not here, this place would fall apart". Not kidding, this is what he says. To all that will listen. And he truly believes it. The depths of his mans delusions shock even me.

On one such occasion when he was tooting his own horn, a friend of mine sent me an email to express her frustration. She works for this man. I used to, but got out when I could. Unfortunately, I still work in the same office and must deal with his department on a daily basis.

My friend, Victoria, sent me this:

"I am so tired of listening to his crap:

1. It has to be man in this job, no one would listen to a women, yada yada yada
2. I was going to retire 5 years ago but every time I said I was going I would get called to the big house (head office).

My God, can no one make him shut up?"

No Victoria, nothing can make him shut up. I thought of buying a muzzle but I think getting it on him would pose a problem.

So, being the opinionated moron that I am, I of course had to reply to this plea for help:

"He is one of those pompous individuals that think their poop don't stink . He sits there and (my new favourite term for windbags) waxes poetic about sh*t that no one cares about. No one cares how much he paid for his first cruise, especially the lowly employees who make crap money compared to his manager's salary (overpaid if you ask me). No one cares that he is so high on himself, he couldn't smell his own fart in an oxygen deprived 2' x 2' closet if he was locked in.

I hope and pray that one day my dream will come true. This is my dream.

So what usually happens to people that have become too big for their knickers - one day, someone will come in here and they will have no regard for him or his bullsh*t. They will listen to his overbearing bull crap for about 2 minutes before they say "Would you shut up you useless dink of an individual." One day, the CEO or the VPs will be gone, either retired or moved on to a normal company and they will hire a person with brains who won't give a damn that he's been here since Jesus was crucified. He's not a God, he's not the end all and be all of all civilization, and frankly, no one is. We are all just here to do a job and not listen to the pointless ramblings of a delusional, self absorbed old man who should have retired 8 years ago.
So when that day comes, I will be a happy individual and will once again believe in a higher power. My momma always told me when I was young, what goes around comes around and every jerk gets his just desserts in one form or another. I truly believe that.

So, raise your hands in the air and pray with me sister, because one day, the rainbow overhead will shine bright and we shall be free. WE SHALL BE FREE!!!"

Uh huh. I told you it was boring......